Sonntag, 31. Oktober 2010


Today the weather was so warm a sweater was all
I needed to take a stroll outside.

And I was brave today.

Do you know the concept behind being brave?

Being brave: Doing one thing a day that scares you.

Samstag, 30. Oktober 2010

What makes me special?

The last years I have tried to become a grown up version of myself.
I went to therapy and read a lot of self-help books.

Why did I need all this?

I can only guess, but I think it has something to do with the genes I inherited and with my upbringing. I can not change the genes I inherited so all I can change is the behaviour and the believings I learned during my childhood.

I believe my parents wanted the best for me but they were not able to do the best. Nothing spectacular but I was not able to live my life in a good way.
And I still struggle a lot.

Therapy is a great way to learn more about yourself. It may be hard to find a good therapist but it is worth the search.

For good self-help books I highly recommend the books written by Martha Beck. She writes funny and the books are easy to follow. And a good workbook is "The Happiness Trap:Stop Struggling, Start Living" by Russ Harris.

Autumn weekend

Nothing spectacular at this side. Sleeping long, breakfast, going shopping
for food, cooking lunch ...

And time to dive into fabrics!
My hubby is away for the weekend so our living-room is a showplace
for fabrics. :-)

Freitag, 29. Oktober 2010


Today I left work early. I wanted to get some sunshine on my skin.

Heck, it is still dark night when I leave home each morning and the

sun has most days allready said goodbye when I come back home.

I do not know how you feel, but I need a bit sunshine for my soul.

Mittwoch, 27. Oktober 2010

Dienstag, 26. Oktober 2010

Today - my little space

After some days with rain and clouds today was a lovely day to walk.
Grey changed in colours and so did my mood.
Isn't it fascinating how much life in general gets brighter when the sun shines?

Sonntag, 24. Oktober 2010

Today - grey

I wanted to show a pic of grey and white.
My first paperwhite narcissus is in bloom.
Well, it is more a pic in very dark and not so dark grey.

The weather is very callinging with wind, rain and dark clouds.
I decided to take this pic with whatever natural light i could get.
I wanted to lighten the colour but was not sucessful in doing so.
So all I have today is grey...

Same with myself,
I want o be the perfect girl, wife...

Samstag, 23. Oktober 2010


I missed the net the last days or better call it weeks.
I was so burned after work and ill on the weekends
all I wanted in my free time was sleep.
I missed some meals and that tells you something.
I am the one who loves to eat.

Today I found the colour blue on my balcony.
It is autumn here so the trees are in glorious colours.
But blue?

Lovely bulbs shopped online from the netherlands
some weeks ago started to develop flowers.
And they are a rich blue.

Our house still waits to get started with the repairs.
We believe it will take until spring before we can move.

I started to look around to get inspiration how to
decorate the new space. I still do not know if I prefer
wallpaper or painting the walls one colour.
What do you prefer?

Sonntag, 10. Oktober 2010

Sonntag, 3. Oktober 2010

Feeling like a part is missing

What I really hate to admit is, that I was told again that I miss social skills.
I was never the most loved person, more an outsider hoping to fit in.
Well, told again missing the necessary social skills I feel like this bug.
I do not know why I am the way I am. I can only guess...

All I want so much is to fit in.