Samstag, 28. Juni 2014

I need help

Anybody out there who can help me to find an interesting master course that is part-time and not to expensive?

Germany or elsewhere.

I have a bachelor in public administration, but I would love to do a master in mindfullness, art or general studies.

Any guesses?


I know, I should be learning nonstop now. Well, that will not be.
I am happy that I did a lot last weekend and I hope that it is enough what I did.

I could not get myself to my books as much as I would have liked.
I am grown up and should take it more serious.

Well, I am how I am.

Today I saw for the first time teeny teeny shrimps. About 3 mm long and pale.
Very very little guys.

My fishes are on vacation outside so the shrimps are coming out of their caves more often.
One fish did not like it outside and decided to do suicide by jumping out of the pond.
Now four fishes are left.

Montag, 23. Juni 2014

These days

These days I am happy to have some time outside. To have others to learn together.

This pic is from last weekend ca. 3 hours south of Hannover.

Freitag, 20. Juni 2014


Today I will take my first long drive for some time visiting a friend three hours south.
Being back on Sunday.

Hope to come back with pics - maybe not, coz we will learn together for next exams.

Donnerstag, 19. Juni 2014


Somehow today I nearly fell down the stairs.

I got the "we do not want you" letter again for my last jobsearch - not so bad coz I want to stay where I am, but still...

Our waterkettle decided to get ill - not stopping to boil, ehhh.

Just the little normal shit that happens.

Hope you day was better.

Samstag, 14. Juni 2014


Today went better than I thought. O.k., I still do not love to be critizised by my parents, but I have learned to set them boundaries. Was not easy and will never be easy, but it was worth the effort until now.

Have read Rene Brown recently. Do you know her work?

Freitag, 13. Juni 2014

Dear Mum and Dad

You told me some months ago that you will come tomorrow for an overnight stay coz you are invited to a birthday in a restaurant nearby and Dad is to old to drive home late at night.

Dear Mum,
yes, I know Dad is old and it is very convenient to stay overnight here, but why did you not ask?

I would have loved to have to make a decision if it is possible or not.

I would have loved to say no for some reasons. You will not understand me I believe, but it is not easy for me to have you around. You are a big shame trigger for me. It took me nearly 40 years to overcome this picture of my worthlessness and that I am allowed to have opinions on my own (well, not when I ask you, I know).

You never take me serious - you alltimes tell me someone is worse of when I just want someone to share not so great things with. When I am not complaining you alltimes tell me who got a child, a better job and so on so. You are not interested in any effort I do - I am just lucky or could do better.
You very seldom forget to tell me I should loose some weight.

When you visit I try to have some time outside - it is much easier for me around you. I allready started to clean the flat today and it is really inconvenient for me to have you and Dad around.
I am not at ease during this time and I do not have much time for you - my next exams are waiting and I  need some time for myself, too.

Your visit is not something I am looking forward happily to.

Sorry, but it is this way.

Sonntag, 8. Juni 2014

Today - early morning

I went out to get some pics in my frontyard today.
And when I was there camera in my hand I saw an oldtimer coming and stopping.
A beautiful car.
I asked for pics and had a short chat with the driver.
A bit later I finally took the pics in my frontyard.
The wild geranium did come univited into my garden - it is a wild flower (pics 3 +6).
I like it coz it grows pretty - and you?

Freitag, 6. Juni 2014


I was supposed to learn together in the South from yesterday on until sunday.

Well, it was not to be.

Wednesday I did not feel well, on Thursday it got worse.
Today I still feel like shit. My whole body itches, my eyes do not look good.
And I allready have stayed at home taking medicine, ugh.

Sonntag, 1. Juni 2014

Today - my garden

Some flowers are allready in bloom others are still germinating.
I am happy to have a little garden.